It’s 1:42 am, and I’m in my room half asleep.

It’s 1:42 am as I listen to Billie Eilish and Khalid

in my room that is half lit by the rising sun past midnight,

in my room that is half lit by memories of every goodbye.


I cannot describe the peace and calm I feel,

hidden beneath the soul that screams.


In this midsummer night

the fresh cut grass pierces through my clothes,

as I lie entangled in the clear night and web of crystal thoughts.

But I have learnt to touch and caress,

I know how to put them on hold.

I have learnt to silence the void I embrace as my own


Is this a dream?

Because the stars don’t blink like liars now.

Did I fall asleep?

Because the night tastes too intense to be real somehow.

Is this the parallel universe?

What once hurt feels like rhythmic poetry and verse.


I think I’ll wait for the fireflies to rise,

knowing they too will leave me

and dissolve under this sky.


© That Girl in the Fray, 2018.  All rights reserved.

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