The piercing ache shoots from my legs
and gnaws upwards,
like a million buckets of ice covering every inch of my skin
to a point I don’t know if I’m cold or burning.
Your hands were what saved me, although I will deny it
Your touch was what made me feel human, although I will deny it
Meaningless dreams are the place we meet now
without the anchor of your vow
Silent dreams are where I see you now
because I can feel the drug leave my body
and if I hear your voice, I know I will relapse
I don’t look at the pictures anymore
I have lost my strength and crumbled
I don’t think of the happy times anymore
because I know I will fall and stumble
But this hollow ache
this blankness behind my mask
these screams in my chest
these cuts on my arms
won’t stop haunting me.
Yet I cannot stop dreaming in monochrome.
© That Girl in the Fray, 2018. All rights reserved.